Thursday, January 26, 2006

self obsessed

I got a call from Frankfurt airport. I couldn't stop smiling. And my day was going so well. I felt happiness. Then I realised that I am not going to see him for a while. And I was sad again.

Then I got online. And my ex was on line. We spoke and I told him about how I met someone after 14 years. Then he tells me, as a by the way in the conversation, that he is seeing someone.

Ain't that a kick in the head? For a few minutes I hurt all over. We have had conversations before about this, he'd ask me if there was anyone I was seeing and I would ask him, the answer was always "no" from him, and "i've been on a date, nothing special." from me.

What hurts is that he didn't tell me about it. I think I deserved to be told in a better way. I am over him, i think. I mean it's been too long for me to think about it. Almost two years apart. He is still a great friend and will always be. I would do anything for him.

I think it was more of an ego issue. It's always about me anyway.

Why not me first?

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